I'd like to welcome all of you who are new to disc golf, and have come across this website because of the disctv shows you've seen. My name is Joe THE, and judging from some recent posts on chat rooms/message boards associated with a certain professional organization that caters to the association of disc golfers, it seems that I've been given the unwanted title of Disc Golf Ambassador or something. I'll explain later, but first, since you are obviously new to the disc golf phenomenon, I wanted to be one of the first, if not the first, to welcome you to this fun-filled game.
Let me first address the Ambassador title. You, New Golfer, will undoubtedly find yourself searching the Net for more info about this awesome game. One of the places you're sure to find is the DISC-ussion (isn't that clever??) board for the Professional Disc Golf Association. Let me first tell you that whatever is said on the discussion board, it has to be true. Always. Quite a few of the finest minds in disc golf spend hours upon hours upon hours of their days (workdays for some, I'm sure) dissecting the rules of the game, putting their own spin on the rules, chatting about who the better action hero is (Ahhhh-nold or Jackie Chan), who will win the Stanley Cup, and other heated topics of debate so relevant to the sport. But, it's all done in good fun.
It's the readers of pdga.com who made me aware of how important I am to disc golf, what with me being a contributor to disclife.com and all. I never realized that the success of disc golf hangs on my every word! What an honor. I can only surmise from some anonymous posters that I must be the hinge that will either open up the world to disc golf, or close down the sport all together. The pressure is killing me. But I accept it on behalf of this sport that I love!
So, New Golfer, you probably have a few questions about this game. I'll try to answer as many as space permits, so go ahead and fire away!
New Golfer (NG): Joe THE, or should I call you Mr. Ambassador? (laughs) One thing I noticed about the game is that a lot of gambling goes on during events. Is this normal?
Joe THE (JT): Oh no no no, New Golfer. That's not gambling, that's collections for….um…er…course improvements! Yeah, that's it. See, gambling on sports is illegal in most states, and no one in disc golf would ever consider doing anything illegal. Heck, we won't even break the speed limit to get to a tournament on time! Nosiree, that's not gambling you're seeing. Most courses have to survive on funds provided by the local golfers. These funds help with course maintenance, basket replacement, parties….clean-up parties that is (nervous laughter). The money you see exchanging hands is completely for course maintenance.
NG: I've found that on the PDGA discussion board there's a lot complaining about how the rules are enforced, and I seem to get the impression that the rules aren't enforced, or when they are, it's done arbitrarily. What gives?
JT: Once again New Golfer, the nuances of the game will come to you as you become more familiar with it. What you are seeing are just examples of what could happen if we didn't have such clearly written rules. For example, one of the rules that is very clear is that if you throw a disc and it gets caught up in a tree over 2 meters up, it is out-of-bounds
(OB). No one ever complains about this rule because it is so clear-cut. Bu, there are those who offer suggestions to help more clearly define the rule (i.e. make it work in their favor) so that there are no "gray areas". That's all. Everyone who plays this game plays by the rules. Let me also point out that at some courses, you'll see what appear to be foot faults on drives and putts. Again, these people are clearly not foot faulting….they are just choosing to "color outside the lines," so to speak. I say "Hooray!" for their originality!
NG: Let's say that there's a day when I have a question about how to throw a disc, but there is nobody at my local course to ask the question to…what's my best course of action?
JT: That's an easy one. If I were you, I would not -- I repeat, WOULD NOT -- bother taking the disc to an open field and just chucking it until you feel comfortable with the disc's characteristics. No no no. Don't you know that the field could be full of ground hog holes, or gopher holes? Jeezz…if you don't see one of these holes, you could do some serious damage to yourself if you fell into one of these. No. Even better, is to go on a discussion board and post the question of how to throw the disc. There will be more than enough people who will chime in and describe how to throw it. That's the best place to learn disc golf…in front of a computer screen, not actually out on a course playing.
NG: Wow…just like a video game! Excellent…I love video games. After all, why would I want to be outside in the beautiful weather when I can be locked up inside all day, eh?
JT: Ha ha ha! You'll find that you wouldn't be alone New Golfer.
NG: One final question, Joe. I've read your other articles, and find most of them to be pretty funny. Some are lame, but I'm not sure I understand why there are those who want to attack you for doing something for free? Essentially, you are a volunteer for disc golf, thus, working for the game. What gives with the grumpy people?
JT: I can't answer that question, NG. Some people are only happy when they're being mean and miserable. I can only say I'm glad I'm not them. Maybe they just feel like it's easier to rip others than to do something constructive for the game. After all, if they actually did care about disc golf, they wouldn't be wasting so much time posting back and forth all day. Instead, they would be volunteering for a leadership position in their club, conducting disc golf demos at local schools, planting new courses or submitting articles to this website or to Disc Golf World News, or simply go out to their own course and pick up a little trash. I don't know. I guess it's just easier to criticize and call people names. They don't bother me with their negativity. It's just too bad that it appears on a website that is going to visited by people like you, New Golfer, who are trying to find out about the game. What a welcome, eh?
By the way, New Golfer, did you know that, according to some of the PDGA Disc-ussion board posters, I'm a doofus? I prefer goofball, but doofus ain't so bad. The funniest moments, though, are when two golfers start their verbal back-and-forths at each other when they disagree about something. I say they should settle their differences the proper way...on Comedy Central's Let's Bowl. However, I have actually seen disc golfers attempting to bowl. It's not pretty.
NG: Thanks Joe for taking the time to answer my questions. I'll be sure to stop by again, but not before I check out the chat rooms!
JT: Before you go, it's only fair that I let you know that occasionally there is some useful info on that the discussion board: tournament updates, new disc info, a disc golfer who is in the hospital, etc. Too bad the good gets lost in the psychobabble rap.
NG: "Psychobabble Rap"….Alan Parsons Project. What a doofus song!
Thanks again Joe. I look forward to a round of golf with you if I'm ever in Philly. I don't have to call you Mr. Ambassador, do I?
JT: Ha! No, doofus is preferable, but there's no need for any title other than my name. Thanks for stopping by New Golfer. I hope all of your golf is fun golf!
Roc(k) on!
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